Sister envy

      

 

I always wished that I had a sister.

I used to pretend one of my baby dolls was my baby sister.



Once I asked my mom, so close to her own baby sister, if she ever had another little girl what would she name her?



She said, "I always liked the name Belle, after Mamaw, her name was Rosa Belle."



My mom doesn't remember this conversation, 

but I do.


 

Eva Rose's baby sister is named Maggie Belle.

When she was born, Mom said, tearfully, "I am so glad that Eva Rose has a sister now."



I hear them:

"You be the mommy fairy, and I'll be the little girl fairy, and I pa-tend I was bad at fairy school today..."

I feel a mixture of joy



and envy



for the sister I never had.



When they fight - and boy do they fight - I tell them, "You are so blessed to have a sister



I never had a sister. Now make each other laugh or go to your room."



They run away giggling



to play more fairy games.

nine

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The high, high, high cost of living

Shepherd has gotten really interested in money lately. Like, really interested. I'm sure it's developmentally appropriate and all but like most developmentally appropriate stages, it's rather annoying.

Who just said that? Only a horrible mother would say that! Ohmygah I can't believe you just said that. {Pitiful exhale.}

My particular favorite was when he asked an acquaintance, as we were riding in her car, "Is this a luxury car?" Love those awkward moments.

Good news: he's constantly asking how he can earn money. Bad news: as his grasp of finances is still developing, he believes that a chore such as cleaning the car is worth at least $100. It's like negotiating salaries with a deranged union boss.

He also has declared himself the expert on how much all things cost. "Too bad your Barbie's head fell off, cuz you can't get another one - they're like $60," he'll announce to his sister. Or, "Mom, can we go buy a Bay Blade? They're only two dollars!"

His expertise, much like his service value, is over-inflated.

Bless his heart.

Last night he made a similar statement at dinner so Walker decided to quiz him on the price of things.

His answers:

Item	Shep’s estimate
New bicycle	$86
New car	$559
New house	$2,122
Daddy’s salary	$1,000,000
Teachers’ salaries	$1,000,036
Bethie’s adoption	$1,000,573
Dinner at a restaurant for 6	$42
New TV	$300
Gallon of milk	$1.79

Quite delusional, he is.

While he may not have a future in business, at least now we know he'll fit right in should he decide to run for Congress!

Communion

Walker and I were married the weekend before Thanksgiving and Lance and Karre were just two of many faceless names my husband asked that I send a wedding invitation. Then they couldn't come to our wedding, because they had just had a baby boy.

Six weeks later, at Reagan and Lisa's New Year's Eve party, I sat on a couch feeling slightly nauseated, completely stunned, and conspicuously declining the flutes of champagne provided to ring in 2003. Then Lance and Karre appeared, proudly snuggling the reason they had missed our wedding.

His tiny little head bobbed as he tried to avert his tiny little eyes from the strobe light that had been positioned by the couple who were a few years away from parenthood. I held baby Thomas in my arms, staring at him in a way I'd never stared at a baby before. I'm gonna have one of these. Soon. One of these. Soon. Oh my Lord. Me. One of these. Soon!

The following August, I had one of those. We named him Shepherd Emmanuel.

Nine years later, on the weekend before Thanksgiving, great buddies Shepherd and Thomas stood together, sheepish, proud, and so so handsome. They've confessed their need for a savior, and expressed a desire to commune with him regularly through the sacrament of the bread and the wine.

After their first communion a celebration followed at Lance and Karre's house, who are so much more to me now than just names. And this time, I did not decline the champagne.

Congratulations to my sweet son Shep and his sweet buddy Thomas. You are loved dearly by parents here below and even more so by a Heavenly Father above. May your hearts' desire always be to commune with your Savior, whose heart's desire is always to commune with you.

Sunny side up with a side of Romans 9

My friend Ruth sent me this email this morning. Which shows how one of my Scariest Mommy Moments turned into a Teachablest Moment.

"All the kids have been very inquisitive lately about the nature of salvation and how God saves us.  I've been trying to explain that it's all God, nothing on our part.  That God does everything because we can do nothing.  That because Christ has done everything, we don't have to do anything.  

"This morning God gave me a great illustration to use that involved an incident with Ike.  I had a conversation over breakfast with Reece that went like this:

"Me: Remember when Ike was here and fell into the pool on accident?

Reece: Oh yeah!  Hahahahaha.  Mrs. Dollahon totally freaked out and dived in to save him.

Me: Did she wait for Ike to cry out "Come help me!  Save me! I can't swim"?
Reece: No she just jumped in with her clothes on.

Me: Did she say to Ike: Swim to the edge and I'll pull you out?

Reece: No she threw off her glasses and dived in.  She dived head first!  She could've cracked her head on the bottom of the pool. 
Me: So she didn't say "Hey Ike, grab onto this pole and I'll pull you to safety?"

Reece: Noooooo! She didn't say anything.  She just jumped in.

Me: That's right.  She jumped in to save Ike even before he realized he was drowning.  What did Jesus do for you?

Reece: He dived right in to save me before I even called for help."

A to the men.

It wasn't so long ago that you were mired in that old stagnant life of sin. You let the world, which doesn't know the first thing about living, tell you how to live. You filled your lungs with polluted unbelief, and then exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. 

It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us. He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ. He did all this on his own, with no help from us! Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah.

Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It's God's gift from start to finish! We don't play the major role. If we did, we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! 

No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing. 

Ephesians 2:1-10 - The Message (of course)

TLC for TLZ Auction for 3 Special Boys

From Charisa:

While picking up our son, Teshale, this year, we met and were burdened by three young boys at IAN’s care center. Three boys who have been waiting over a YEAR for family. Why? Because they are older—8, 9, and 10.  A Year. Imagine that! Watching other kids and parents come and go while you still wait.

Many other families have felt the same burden. Some families have already met them. Some have just seen pictures and heard stories.  But all have a desire to do something—anything—to help them have a family. a home. love.

A group of us have joined together to do everything in our power to help these children. We are hosting an online silent auction to bring awareness to their needs and to provide grants for the families who step up to provide them a home. 100% of the money we raise will go towards those grants!  The grants will be split between these 3 boys.

The auction starts Tuesday, Nov 15 at 6am (eastern time) and will end Friday, Dec 2 at 9pm (eastern time.)

Head on over a take a look!

www.tlcfortlz.blogspot.com

There are many many items and you are bound to find something that you just HAVE to have.  There are many Ethiopian items brought back by adoptive families are included (including that beloved coffee!), artwork created just for this auction, jewelry, music, books, Karen Purvis items, and much more.

And..shipping is free on all items!

Come shop—and bless these boys and their future families.

Missy's Two Minute Tip: Natural cure for depression

Hi y'all!

I am headed out this afternoon to speak at a ladies' retreat so I am totally gonna hijack someone else's blog post. But it's a post that I've been meaning to write for a long time, and Sandy just did, so yea me!

Sandy is talking about a natural remedy for depression called Sam-E.

I've had issues with PMS, PPMD and depression since Aunt Flo first came for a visit in the early 80s, Took me a while to realize it was treatable - I just thought I was 'very emotional' and 'prone to moodiness.' Ha! I'm prone to going postal on the waiter if they forget to put my salad dressing on the side. Once in high school I saw a dead cat on the side of the road and cried for three hours. I crossed the bridge from moody to bananas. But then, one week later, I'm happy and normal.

The wacky hormone curse runs rampant in my family tree, turns out. My birthmom had a hysterectomy in her 20s just to get rid of the PMS. Yea, gene pool!

I had post-partum depression (PPD) with two of my four kiddos - once pretty bad, once just so-so bad. The first time, getting pregnant cured it. The second time, after Maggie's birth, 400mg of Sam-E and 4 fish oil pills a day cured it. Cured it fast. Like within four days fast. And I nursed while I took it.

After Ike's very traumatic birthday and NICU stay, I knew that I was such high risk for PPD that I started popping my Sam-E immediately. I never got it! Can't say that's for sure why, but I think it probably was. I made up for it about a year later when the hormones went to Crazy Town. But at least during his infancy, I was just fine.

I have read a study that said that Sam-E was as effective as Prozac in curing PPD. I cannot find that study now to save my life, but trust me, I read it with my own eyes.

I am in no way against taking prescription medicine if that's what you need. I've had to go that route before too. But if depression can be cured naturally with something you can pick up at Target, then oh my skull, let's try the natural approach first. Plus anti-depressants make me fat. Fat and happy, but fat. (Sandy too, we've co-whined often.)

Oh - one more thing. One of the ways that my PPD manifested itself was in incredibly irrational and constant fears about my kids dying (see this post). In the past few months, I've had three new moms email and say they are obsessed with their baby dying! So while, it is common, IT IS NOT NORMAL. It's those stupid hormones stealing your joy. Sam-E might just restore it, my friend.

Hormones are one of the best weapons in Satan's arsenal, I'm convinced of it. Sigh.

Pop over to God Speaks Today and get more details from Sandy.


Have a good weekend!!

Correspondence between devoted Christians

Wolman, Daniel Daniel.Wolman@turner.com   to Missydoll

Hello,
I am Mrs Elizabeth Etters, a devoted christian. I am in the process of setting up a charity foundation but due to my health condition I would need somebody to help me finish it. This mail was sent by one of my PA (Wolman Daniel) so please reply to my email address: etterslizzy1001@mynet.com for more details.
Remain Blessed
Elizabeth Etters

 

***********************************

Reply

Missy to etterslizzy1001, Daniel

 9:25 PM (0 minutes ago)

Dear Mrs. Etters,

What a coincidence, I too am currently setting up a charitable foundation!

It is to aid people who have been victims of email fraud! Can you believe the horrific people who earn money by preying on others?? Have they no decency?

If only those people would use their powers of intellect to do some GOOD in the world, instead of living their lives as thieves. Oh, they are truly soldiers in Satan's army! I pray that they would repent and know the joy that comes from knowing Jesus Christ, turn from their evil ways and become warriors for the one true God!

Please feel free to send me a check to help those who have fallen prey to these evil email scammers.

Remain blessed,
Missy

GIVEAWAY WINNERS + I'm kinda obsessed with this song

Okay - First, the NanoStyle $100 Credit Winner -

Random Integer Generator

Here are your random numbers:

33 

Timestamp: 2011-11-08 02:22:17 UTC

Okay, I've never had the last commenter win. Congrats, Jennie Young! 

Now for the $50 Noonday Giveaway:

Random Integer Generator

Here are your random numbers:

42 

Timestamp: 2011-11-08 02:26:12 UTC

(Ack. I always wish for a low number to win because counting all the comments is such a pain. Hey BLOGGER, why don't you number the comments, huh??)

Congrats to Hayley! 

I am speaking at a retreat this weekend for a church in Katy. I'm expanding on my Stable post - I mean, really expanding on it, into three hours of talking expanding. On suffering. Because I obviously like to make myself suffer by trying to speak on a subject as hard stinkin hard as suffering.

This morning I took a break from suffering to make the kids an iTunes Christmas mix, and came across this song, which goes so beautifully with my talk it is making me cry every time I hear it.

SOB. 

Merry {sob} Christmas.

Seeking rat status

With my babywait free time, I am also embarking on another dream. A dream that once I believed to be unattainable, but now, by God's grace and a downturn in the economy, is becoming an affordable reality...

I'm paying perfect strangers good money to take a laser and use it to burn the majority of my body until I resemble a newborn baby rat.

Except, not ugly.
A cute newborn baby rat.
Which doesn't exist.
But you get my point.

When I got my surgery in August WHICH I HAVE TO REPEAT BECAUSE I PUKED AND RIPPED MY STITCHES OPEN THANK YOU VERY MUCH, I got a credit to the doctor's 'spa'.

Now, as I have mentioned, I am a hairy hairy woman. Now I know that we humans are not animals, but created in the image of God.

But y'all, sometimes I look at my arms, or my legs, or my unibrow, and I start to think that Darwin mighta been on to something.

I've been in a battle with my gorilla legs since middle school. No method of hair removal has gone untried. I even had an Epilady - remember those? Yes, I rotated a vibrating coil over my legs while it ripped out the hairs one by one. Because desperate times = desperate measures.

So when the spa opportunity presented itself, I poohpooh'd the fotofacial option, haha'd at the Botox option, and sang out in jubilant song, LASER MY LEGS, PLEASE!!!!!

I'm don't think that I've been this excited about making an appointment that didn't involve an epidural in my life. I went last Thursday.

And of course, I photojournaled it for you, my sweet invisibles.


Here I am in my pink spa robe about to go to the light. The Intense Pulsed Light, that is. 

For once being a white girl with black hair worked in my favor, because that makes me the best candidate for laser hair removal. The light has to actually seek out the root so you shave before you go, so it won't be wasted on visible hair.

My laser girl was a sweet little 25 year old named Leslie, and it was fun talking to a 25 year old for two hours because I don't get to do that very often. Always great to be reminded just how old you are. And that even if in your head, you still think you're 25, yeah, you're so not. So, so not. 

Turns out the machine she used is an IPL, not an actual laser. Hm. This may be a bad thing.

First she put numbing cream on my legs. Then she put this gel all over it - seemed just like ultrasound gel - that is supposed to act as a barrier.

Then she held the little wand right next to my skin, put on her sunglasses, and ZAPPED over and over and over and over. My entire legs, ankle to thigh, in two inch increments.

Did it hurt?

Seriously? Did you just ask me that?

Yes. It hurt. Like hades.
I told her I was ready for my epidural but it just confused her. Silly 25 year old.

Fortunately I had popped one half of a vicodin left over from the surgery which greatly helped. I found out later that other machines have this cool air blower thing on them - well, mine didn't.

Now, I wait. Within two weeks, the hairs are just supposed to fall out. It's been ten days and last night some of them began to - I can tweeze it and it just slides out. Yippee! But a lot of them are still hanging on...so we'll see. It is supposed to take several sessions to work completely - and I've since learned that the IPL isn't considered the best thing for hair removal. Sigh. At least it was free.

The good news, is I have been watching all the Groupon et al sites like a hawk for other laser places in my part of town and they've finally come. I've been a Groupon buyin fool!


Being that I have paid many an East Asian woman to pour hot wax on my face then rip it off as fast as she can whilst singing "No pai no gai!"  on Tuesday, I used Groupon to getting my face lasered. To kill off those turning-forty-gifts. Pa rum pa pa pum.

Four body parts down....approximately fifty more to go!!

Have y'all ever done it? Did it work?

Getting in accidents

Today I got a letter that went something like this:

Dear Mrs. Dollahon,

What the freak with all the doctor visits and physical therapy appointments? 
Did you get in an accident? 
Is there someone we should be suing to pay for this? 
Please call us asap.

Sincerely, 
With love and affection,
Your Health Insurance Company

Our phone conversation will go something like this:

Yes, one of them was an accident. And, well, actually another was too. Then we had two non-accidents and the result of all that was that I had four children in 3.5 years and they were all pretty big with gigantic, gigantic heads that they get from their dad (which I think was my punishment for laughing at his baby pictures) and I am only 5'1 and subsequently they flat out destroyed my back but I could never find time to go to the bathroom by myself much less do something incredibly time consuming like go to the doctor except for my OB of course who I saw more than most family members but NOW the accidents and non-accidents are in school for at least half a day and we are adopting a baby - huh? - Ethiopia - yeah, a baby, as little as possible - no we don't know her yet, we're on a list - well it used to be quick but now it's taking forever - oh that's nice good for them - yeah so we thought she'd be home by now but things in Ethiopia got kinda weird and slow so I suddenly find myself with allllll thiiiiiis freeeee tiiiime (like 20 hours a week! It's zany!) and in between long leisurely solo potty breaks I am taking it upon myself to go to the approximately 25 various doctors I have been avoiding but needing since 2003. So there's really no one to sue but my husband and we don't have any money because have you been listening to my story?

Have a nice day!

(And I was pregnant.)

Trick or TRICK!!!

Okay, being that I am a mean and sadistic mother, this cracked me up.

The only one is our house more sadistic than I is Walker. We will TOTALLY be doing this tomorrow.



If you do it, send me the link to the youtube or the video and I'll post them here.

MUHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Call me the coolest (non-homeschooling) mom EVAH

After day five of summer/full on kid power with no sanity break, Momma was in desperate need of some retail therapy. Tonight I decided that it would be wisest to head on over to WalMart to feed the beast. I am not a WalMart girl, so I figured I could not do too much damage there. I steered clear of Target. Waaaay clear. Cause it's been quite a week, y'all.

For those of you who have asked if I intend to homeschool, well, there's your answer. Not unless we win the lottery so I can support all the retail therapy needs that will ensue from trying to get my ornery kids to do what I want them to do 24/7. And since we don't buy lottery tickets, that means the chances are slim to none.

I just can't do it. Nor do I have even one teeny tiny desire to. Okay, occasionally after watching The O'Reilly Factor I feel the teeniest tiniest of desires, but it always subsides in less time than it takes Maggie to artistically enhance the nearest closet door with a black Sharpie. I have so much respect for you homeschooling moms, and I am glad that the option exists should any of our children not thrive in a regular school setting. But we will be praying to Jesus that they thrive. Thrive, babies, thrive.

Back to WalMart.
Can y'all just bear with me for a moment while I am a wee bit judgmental?

What does a mother have to be smoking to bring her child barefoot to the WalMarts?

The thought - the. very. idea - of naked feet on a WalMart bathroom floor - - pardon me while I go breathe into a paper bag.

Okay. I'm back.

Tomorrow the kids start swim lessons and then we are headed to the beach (yippee!) and Maggie is in need of some bathing suits. WalMart actually has some very, very cute OP swimsuits for toddlers.

Okay, bear with me again. I told y'all it has been a bad week.

Question:

Why do toddler swimsuits need to have the sides cut out of them, like this? Could we at least wait until the kids are in kindergarten before we try to sexualize them? Is that really so much to ask?

I'm done.

I found one for Mags on sale for only $7, and decided that Eva Rose could use another one as well. There was a so cute mod orange and brown striped tankini that I just loved. I put it in the shopping cart, admiring it, and then - I spied another one.

And I was faced with quite a conundrum.

The thing is, I am just not into the whole "licensed character" thang. I just think that Dora dresses and Sponge Bob t-shirts are, well, um, tacky. You know me, I would keep 'em in smocking till high school if I could.

Problem is I have an almost five year old daughter who is very, very into the Disney Princess thang.

As a compromise I have decided that cartoon characters is why God gave us pajamas. I let them be as tacky as they want at night. Alone. In the dark.

But tonight, before me, was a pink (oooo, I LOVE pink Mommy!) swimsuit with ruffles (ooooo, Mommy, I LOVE ruffles!) emblazoned with the Princess Trinity: Belle, Aurora and Cinderella (ooooo, MOMMY I LOVE PRINCESSES! SLEEPING BEAUTY IS MY FAVORITE PRINCESS EVAH!) And might they have what was sure to be a jealous Maggie's size oh what do you know they did.

Aw, crud.

My eyes went back and forth between the cute mod looking orange tankini and the tacky Princess Trinity. Back and forth, back and forth. Meanwhile, an (annoying) voice inside of me whispered Die to self, die to self.

I did it.

I died.


Tomorrow morning an almost five year old little girl who is very, very into pink and ruffles and Disney Princesses is going to have a conniption fit when she sees what her mommy bought her and her sister at the WalMart.

And then it will all be worth it.

Right??

rerun from June 2009