Friday, October 12, 2012

31 Days for Dummies Day 12

Oh yeah, I was supposed to do this every day. Oops.

Here is what greeted me just now when I returned from dropping off kids

If you smush pretzels, they will come

I'm not a big critter person. There, I said it. But as critters go, I happen to like frogs. Maybe it's Muppet indoctrination from my 70s youth. I think it's because a frog never hurt anyone. Who do you know that's ever complained of a frog bite? Only a mosquito, and that's just more reason to love them.

I also love them because they are so stinkin aloof. Froggy don't care about your personal problems. You could get attacked by flying monkeys right in front of Froggy, he wouldn't bat an eye. Froggy say get over it. 

Ike has this book that he loves for me to read to him. It shows cute little bugs and butterflies and dragonflies all bucolic like by a pond and then this frog sticks out it's long tongue and SLIP SLAP SLURP gobbles up every one of them. But wait, nature gets her revenge, because soon cute fat froggy is 86ed by an alligator.

It's basically a primer on psychopathy for kids. Ike laughs and laughs and laughs.

Which pretty much explains what I witnessed this morning:

Eva Rose: Aw! Look at this little snail crawling on the sidewalk! It's so cute!
Ike: Hi snail. {CRUNCH} Bye snail. 

Ikey don't care about your personal problems.  Ikey say get over it.


  1. We were on vacation once. Stopped at a gas station. My girls showed me the prettiest bug I had ever seen. I even took a picture of it. They both oohed and aahed over it. Then one of them stepped on it. I guess his purpose was done and it WAS a bug. So she took care of it. I hope they don't do that to me when they're grown.

  2. My daughter was 8, I think, when she took to animals very deeply. So one day when she told me to come look at the baby mice in the window well, I was very surprised to see her speak of how cute they were, then proceed to STEP ON THEM AND SMUSH THEM. I think she was switched at birth...

  3. We have that same book!! I think it's a favorite for little boys. My boys have actually ripped the tongue off, and the inside of the book is separate from its cover now. Well loved, I suppose.

  4. I'm sure that you have enough going on in your day, but children and bugs reminded me of a hysterical post I read over at the Honest Toddler. It also reminded me of Tim Hawkins and his Fire Ant song. What can I say, I like to laugh... at least as much as I like children ;)

    Happy waiting! (well, at least Joyful waiting) We're headed out for our Russian court trip tonight. We'll get to see our girl soon. I hope the same for you.

  5. Funny post, but I'm pretty sure that is a toad and not a frog. Wrong color and all bumpy.

  6. Oh, Missy, I am laughing so hard that my 12-year-old came over and read your post too. And now he asked to read it again, and I think he wishes you were his mother. :o) Hoo boy . . . I am slap-happy after a BAAADD week of a 5-year-old with pneumonia, replacing brakes, returned dossier documents, and a husband who (like Walker) was out of town when all this stuff happened. Thanks for a belly laugh!

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  7. My seven-year-old was waving spiders by their legs at her terrified (and very caring) nine-year-old sister yesterday. Nice. I thought I was the only one with a child who is either psychopathic or Aspergery. I've come to the conclusion that Asperger's may actually be a relief and I'm going to request a talk with the school nurse o_O

  8. I also love them because they are so stinkin aloof. Froggy don't care about your personal problems.

    LOL! I love that about animals :-)

    Who knew that these little guys like pretzels! (Mister toad says, "Next time, dipped in mustard, please.")

  9. My kids treat every ant, worm, caterpillar, ANY CREATURE as a very treasured pet......I have found my three year old petting slugs calling them Sally (every doll, pet, imaginary thing is either Jack or Sally). It makes the mama guilt creep in because we have outlawed pets. I don't want to have to clean up one more creatures poop if I don't have day we even set out a piece of rotting banana for some kind of a fly that kept appearing in the living room....the kids wanted to feed him. I figured it was the least i could do.....



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